Saturday, 9 March 2013

Rantings of a host Mum

So orginally this blog was set up to give an insight into the everyday goings on in a host family. It was going to be a nicey nice look at the days and events that happen.
Ok so I've been lax in keeping up with it, but to be fair there isn't enough hours in the day when your running two houses, with between seven to twelve guests, one teenage daughter, two children under five and a husband. It doesn't leave much me time between the cooking, cleaning and refereeing (children & guests).

So first let me tell you why we got into this in the first place (just so you don't think I'm a raving lunatic). Most families it's true get into it as a way to make some extra money to help with the running of their houses, payment of their, mortgage. But you quickly learn that this isn't a get rich quick scheme by any means. You must enjoy it and enjoy people to be able to continue.

Yes you get paid to provide a home from home for people but some months it just about covers the cost of having an extra one or two people in your home. You are of course aware of the fact that you will have "strangers" in your home. But what most families don't realise is the actually cost to you and your family.

It is on the whole a fantastic experience and in our experience has more positives than anything, or else believe me we wouldn't be doing this for the last eight years.

Positives:
- The wide range of interesting and really lovely people we have met over the years. After all this time I still learn something new with each and every guest.

- The exposure to different cultures.

- We have made some wonderful friends from all over the world, as have our children.

- Travel oppertunities, that we have yet to take up.

- It has been great for our children to again meet different people, experience different cultures. It has made the children good mixers, confident in dealing with people and tolerant of others.

- The satisfaction of knowing you have helped someone enjoy their time and that they have appreciated what you and your family have done.

Downsides:

- Extra work. Cooking, cleaning, parenting & worrying in some cases.

- You sacrifice a lot of your time. Personal & family.

- Some people when you give an inche will take a mile.

- And sometimes you get a guest or guests that push you over the edge and suck the joy out of what you do.

I try not to judge people from where they come from.  I mean if we all fit our country seterotypes we in Ireland would be all be raving alcoholic fighters. But I have found, with some exceptions, that some nationalities present you with a bit more of a challenge than others and some are just not compatible with living in an Irish family, because of cultural differences. As a result there are some (very few) that have made my "will not host" list.

For example, I have had some men/males who in their country the women are not equal to them. As such they bring this with them. I have tried having a conversation with them where they will answer my husband when I ask a question. Or they will totally ignore me.
They do not take advice or direction from me and do not appreciate having to sit and eat dinner with females at they table.
Now this is a cultural aspect that I would prefer not to have to tolerate and also feel my guests shouldn't have to. Nevermind the fact that I do not wish my children to learn that it is ok to treat anyone like this.

People choose to stay in a host family to be part of a family. This is what we try to provide and for the most part we have succeeded

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